Do you love the Real Housewives?

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Instead of channel surfing are you stuck on Bravo channel watching reruns of Patty Stanger being mean and taking her bitterness out on her clients?  

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Is Andy Cohen the closest thing you have to a friend?  

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Well, alcohol can only help.

Relax and enjoy a Bravolini, here is a recipe I am sure you will want to share with your friends and frenemies.



INGREDIENTS:

1 muddled Georgia peach  -  Get one that is slightly overripe, don't worry about blemishes or marks on the skin.



1 California orange  -  Choose a hard one with bright orange shiny skin, if you can't find a fresh California orange, substitute about 6   ounces of reconstituted, frozen Florida orange juice.  Color and taste are slightly unnatural and fake but hey that IS natural in Florida.



1 cup California Brandy  -  Buy a cheap one, celebrate questionable taste.



2 bottles of Bad French champagne  -  If you are on a budget, substitute pro seco and voila you are 1/16th I-talian.



DIRECTIONS:

Juice the orange, slice the peach and discard the pit.  Muddle the peach with orange juice, add brandy, shake and strain.  Add approximately  1 1/2 ounces of strained mixture in a flute glass and carefully fill with champagne.  

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Garnish with a strip of orange peel, a diamonique from the Joan Rivers collection on the Shopping Channel, or use real diamonds and show everyone how you roll.



If you will be serving these at your next soiree with diamonds, cubic zirconia, or even toothpicks , please consider hiring EMTs who look like strippers, as opposed to strippers who look like EMTs.  (I wouldn't mention it but safety comes first with Felixxxmom.)



Am I the only person who is glad to see the RHOA Kandi and NeNe lost the mohawks, I mean faux-hawks, I mean let's get real housewives...Kandi and NeNe lost their "ho"-hawks.  

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And PorSHA may have Hosea Williams' legacy, but Kendra has Rosa Parks' hair.















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